Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Our society is confusing

Our society is confusing by Rob Hood©12-17-08

THE LEFT HAND DOES NOT KNOW WHAT THE RIGHT HAND IS

DOING.

THE LAWYER DOES NOT KNOW WHO HIS CLIENT IS SUING.

THAT'S THE WORLD THAT WE KNOW.

IF SOMETHING MAKES SENSE, IT WON'T GO.

AND NOW NO INTEREST IS ACCRUING!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

My thoughts on radiation treatment

My thoughts on radiation treatment by Rob Hood©12-16-08

Sing this to the tune of "My favorite things" by Rodgers and Hammerstein

BLISTERS IN ARMPITS

ON BACK AND

ON SHOULDER,

THEY'RE MORE

IRRITATING

AS THIS TREATMENT

GETS OLDER.

I'M A MAN

IN TERRIBLE PAIN

HOPING THIS

TREATMENT

WILL WORK

TO MY GAIN!

ON MY CHEST

YOU'LL FIND

MANY LINES.

THEY ARE ARRANGED

TO THE X-RAY'S

DESIGNS.

I'LL BE ELATED

WHEN I FINISH

THIS BIT.

MY CRAZY

DOCTOR

SAID IT

WOULDN'T

HURT A WHIT.

THOUGH MY

CHEST BURNS

WHILE IT'S

COLD OUT

I CAN'T LET

IT GET

ME DOWN.

IF IT CAN

RID OF

THIS TERRIBLE

DISEASE

I'LL NEVER WEAR

A FROWN!

Friday, December 12, 2008

Showing my age

Showing my age by Rob Hood©12-12-08

THERE'S A MORTGAGE

ON MY BODY

AND THE CO-OWNER

IS NEAR

BUT INSTEAD OF

BEING A BANKER

HE'S A DOCTOR MY DEAR!

AS I GROW OLDER

AND EACH OF MY PARTS

LOSE IT'S WARRANTY

I HAVE TO RELY

ON DOCTORS

TO MAKE LONG LIFE

MORE OF A CERTAINTY.

I WAS SELF RELIANT

WHEN I WAS JUST

A YOUTH

BUT THAT CAN'T BE

WHEN ONE

IS LONG OF TOOTH.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

My fears

My Fears by Rob Hood©12-2-08

I WAS ON THE

RADIATION TREATMENT

TABLE WHEN THE

POWER WENT OUT

AND IMAGES OF

"DAYS OF THE TRIFFIDS"

FILLED ME WITH DOUBT.

WILL ANYONE COME TO GET

ME FROM THIS ROOM?

WILL I EVER REACH

THE SURFACE OF

A WORLD FILLED

WITH GLOOM?

WHAT WILL BE

MY FUTURE?

IS ANYONE

AROUND?

WILL ANYONE

REDO MY SUTURE?

I DON'T HEAR

A SOUND!

WAIT!

THE POWER IS

COMING

BACK ON!

NOW MY FEARS

CREEP AWAY.

AND I AM

ALL SET FOR

A WARM

PRETTY DAY!

Chaos

Chaos by Rob Hood©12-2-08

WHEN THINGS GO WRONG,

I LOSE MY MIND.

I SEARCH FOR IT ALL OVER.

IT'S SO HARD TO FIND.

I NEED LIFE TO STAY THE SAME.

WHEN I LOSE MY STRUCTURE

IT'S HARD TO STAY

IN MY GAME.

IF I HAVE A PLAN

AND I KNOW

WHAT TO DO,

I CAN RELAX

CONFIDENT THAT

I'LL SEE THINGS THROUGH!

THIS HAS BEEN

A VERY DIFFICULT DAY.

I HOPE THAT I HAVE

FEW OF THEM.

OF THAT I PRAY!

BUT I AM HAPPY

THAT I'M ALIVE!

I'LL HANDLE MY PROBLEMS

BECAUSE I HAVE THE DRIVE

TO HANDLE WHATEVER

COMES MY WAY.

BE IT NIGHT

OR BE IT DAY.

ALL I NEED IS TO

REGROUP AND

THINK OUT MY PLANS

THEN I'LL HAVE

A STRUCTURE

THAT MEETS MY DEMANDS.

I NEED TO KEEP

THINGS SIMPLE.

THAT IS MY PLAN.

THEN I'LL BE

AS HAPPY

AS ANY MAN!

Friday, November 28, 2008

Bathroom Company Jingle

Bathroom Company Jingle by Rob Hood©11-28-08

OUR TOILETS ARE

TRUE AND TRIED.

WHEN WE FLUSH,

WE FLUSH

WITH PRIDE!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Autumn thoughts

Autumn thoughts by Rob Hood©11-27-08

AS THE LEAVES OF

AUTUMN ARE FALLING

AND OUR HOUSING

VALUES TOO

WE THINK OF

FANNIE AND FREDDIE

AND THEIR EXECUTIVES

WE'D LIKE TO SUE.

WE'D LIKE TO PUT

THEM ALL IN PRISON

AND BANISH THEM

FROM OUR SIGHT.

THEY'VE BROUGHT

DOWN OUR ECONOMY

AND CAUSED OUR

NEIGHBORHOODS

TO BLIGHT!

Monday, November 24, 2008

THE ELEVATOR

THE ELEVATOR by Rob Hood©11-24-08

I'M GOING DOWN

TO A LOWER LEVEL.

IT LOOKS LIKE HELL

AND I SPY A

TASMANIAN DEVIL..

BUT HOT AIR RISES

SO I'VE BEEN TOLD

SO I'M NOT FEARFUL.

I AM FEELING BOLD!

LATER I'LL RISE UPWARD

TOWARDS HEAVEN.

I'LL NOT QUIT

TILL I REACH SEVEN!

RIDING THE ELEVATOR

IS THE WAY I GO

I WISH I COULD

GO EXPRESS

BECAUSE THEY

SURE ARE SLOW!

EMPTY CART

EMPTY CART by Rob Hood©11-24-08

TODAY I SAW A MAN PUSH A

FOUR WHEEL CART

IT LOOKED EMPTY.

I DIDN'T THINK

THAT SMART.

BUT SEATED THERE

WARM AND TAN

AND COMPLETELY NUDE

WAS AN INVISIBLE MAN!

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

MY NEIGHBOR

MY NEIGHBOR by Rob Hood©11-18-08

TODAY I ATTEMPTED

TO CLIMB A ROPE.

UNKNOWN TO ME

MY NEIGHBOR PRIMED

IT WITH SOAP.

I AM NOW UPON

A SLIPPERY SLOPE

TO GET MUCH HIGHER

I HAVE LITTLE HOPE.

WHY HAS THIS BEEN

DONE TO ME?

I WAS AS FRIENDLY

TO HIM AS I COULD BE.

NOW IF MY NEIGHBOR

COMMITS AN ERROR

I'LL BE SURE TO DIS HIM

ON THAT I'LL SWEAR!

Odd

Odd by Rob Hood©11-18-08

I DON'T CARE MUCH ABOUT

WHAT'S GOING ON

AROUND THE WORLD

OR THERE UPON.

OFTEN TIMES FROM

MIDNIGHT TILL NOON

YOU'LL FIND ME

WRAPPED UP

IN MY WARM COCOON.

MY LIFE IS INTERESTING

AS TO ME.

I'M ALONE AND

I AM FREE!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Time is not on my side

Time is not on my side by Rob Hood©10-13-08

Time is not on my side

to evade the fears

that I'm trying to hide.

My body is failing.

Disease is impaling.

My being may end.

That seems to be the trend.

As to why I have cancer,

I haven't an answer.

Now I have shingles

and no fun intermingles.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Wake full nights

Wake full nights by Rob Hood©8-22-08

Nights of endless fears

invade my sleep

disrupt my gears.

I sleep fitfully at most

spending hours awake

till my brain is toast!

Then I attempt

to go back to sleep.

It's a waste of time

because my thoughts

still creep.

This must be my time in hell!

I'd like to scream!

I'd like to yell!

But that would disrupt

my family's sleep

and I don't wish

my loved ones

any problems deep!

Thursday, July 31, 2008

The Meaning of Life

The Meaning of Life by Rob Hood©7-31-08

Our lives are all part of God's great plan!

We strive to be of value in our life span!

I thank God for my life each day

by whatever means I use to pray!

As I meet each and every travail

I will stand tall and will not fail!

Life may be full of woes and trouble

but it's worth the struggle through the rubble!

While I'm not sure why I'm here

to God, each of life's purpose

is very clear!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

You can't take things too serious

You can't take things too serious© by Rob Hood
You can't take things too serious

because you'll live in constant fear.

Worry can make you feel delirious

and change everything that you hold dear.

Take one day at a time.

Smile each moment that you are awake!

Make everyday sublime!

Be happy for goodness sake!

Sunday, June 22, 2008

Storm Warning

Storm Warning by Rob Hood©6-22-08

A tornado warning has me alert.

I have fears that I'll be found

Lying in the dirt.

I'm on th 12th floor.

To escape would be

A major chore

I'm in a waiting room

With loads of windows

Near me provoking

My increasing gloom.

I don't want to be a victim.

I'm very fearful

Of the meterologist's dictum.

Fearfully I approach the exit door

as the sound of the storm

begins to roar!

Hail is falling all around.

Pieces of ice as big as

golf balls have hit the ground

Lightning flashes fill the sky

I doubt that when I reach my car

I'll be dry.

I'll be so thankful

if I make it home

I promise in a silent prayer

that I'll never roam.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

A bird in flight

A bird in flight by Rob Hood©6-18-08

I saw a bird in flight

now it's gone

It's out of sight

It carried within its beak

a bunch of bugs

including many worms

and assorted slugs

All such treats that they have brung

will develop the birds

that are their young

After the chicks hatch

from an egg

they are very hungry

and for food they beg

Their parents fly both to and fro

They have no delivery service

of which I know

Thoughts from an old man

Thoughts from an old man by Rob Hood©6-18-08

Every morning when I arise from my bed

I'm filled with glee because I'm not dead

It's true that my body is filled with pain

and at my age it's quite a strain

But when I think about the other option

I'm sure that I'm not ready for it's adoption

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

My visit to the soothsayer

My visit to the soothsayer by Rob Hood©5-27-08

I had many troubles

and each one

seemed to have doubles.

So I needed advice

from a sage

at a low price.

I needed someone local

whose answers would be vocal.

A friend advised me today

to see a soothsayer right away.

I always remember today

recalling what the

soothsayer did say.

He listened to me for a while

and moments later began to smile.

"May all your children be born naked",

said he

I'm filled with doubts how

these words apply to me.

I said, "What does this mean?

What is your inference?"

He answered "One hundred

years from now it won't

make any difference!"

I have now come to see

the best intuition

should come from me.

Friday, May 23, 2008

United we stand

United we stand by Rob Hood©5-23-08

I don't care if you're gay or straight.

Your life on earth should

just be great!

All in the world should celebrate!

We should enjoy our lives

and forget to hate!

We should all find ways

to get along!

If we are united

we will be strong!

If anyone goes after

our weakest link

we should stand up

for justice

and never shrink!

If anyone tries to destroy us whole

we should beat them badly.

Let that be our goal!

Any time we are attacked

we should retaliate double.

Following such a dictum

will keep us well

out of trouble!

The world can be our oyster

if we are one.

If we unite

we can't be undone!

All others will respect

or fear.

We will keep our friends close

and our enemies near.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

The craftsman

The craftsman by Rob Hood©5-21-08

The tenant of the room

wove yarn upon his loom.

He was well studied

in his craft

He worked hard

but never laughed.

He worked both night and day

to get things right

sleep might give way.

He weaved several

intricate designs

all collector's pieces

were the critics opines.

His work was sought out

by many collectors.

Once he had your eye

there were no defectors.

His work was great!

He was the best!

When we purchased his art

we felt well blessed!

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

The space object

The space object by Rob Hood©5-20-08

The meteor flew through space

encrusted with minerals

throughout its base.

It made a colossal hole

at the very end of

its galaxial stroll.

Scientists unearthed it later

and they came up with theories

to make themselves look greater.

Was this the start of global warming?

The earth had been covered in ice

and long winters were storming.

Or was this meteor

a piece of the moon?

To believe these theories

one need be a buffoon.

Scientists need to hatch

such schemes.

It's publish or perish

so they go to extremes!

Monday, May 19, 2008

Life in the boonies

Life in the boonies by Rob Hood©5-19-08

It was Saturday morning

and I felt good

I was out in the suburbs

away from the hood.

I could stay in my crib

if that's what I wanted

away from the gangs

where I was taunted!

I can choose any name

alias or ID.

I'm away from my homies

and I am free!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

The raspberry ant plague

The raspberry ant plague

I am covered all over with ants

They are in my computer

And even in my pants.

I look all over.

I just take a glance.

They are headed

For my neighbor

So I was not

hit by chance.

I tried to sweep them away

But I couldn't stop their advance

They are moving all over

They seem involved in a dance

They are attracted to electrical equipment

That seems so dumb!

I'd like to send their shipment

To kingdom come!

They have ruined pumps at

sewage pumping stations

moving all over

in their migrations.

.They have caused fire alarms to malfunction

They move quickly without compunction.

They are very difficult to kill

They seem to know how to survive

With superior skill.
In what sounds like a really low-budget horror film, voracious swarming ants that apparently arrived in Texas aboard a cargo ship are invading homes and yards across the Houston area, shorting out electrical boxes and messing up computers.

The hairy, reddish-brown creatures are known as "crazy rasberry ants"—crazy, because they wander erratically instead of marching in regimented lines, and "rasberry" after Tom Rasberry, an exterminator who did battle against them early on.

"They're itty-bitty things about the size of fleas, and they're just running everywhere," said Patsy Morphew of Pearland, who is constantly sweeping them off her patio and scooping them out of her pool by the cupful. "There's just thousands and thousands of them. If you've seen a car racing, that's how they are. They're going fast, fast, fast. They're crazy."

The ants—formally known as "paratrenicha species near pubens"—have spread to five Houston-area counties since they were first spotted in Texas in 2002.

The newly recognized species is believed to have arrived in a cargo shipment through the port of Houston. Scientists are not sure exactly where the ants came from, but their cousins, commonly called crazy ants, are found in the Southeast and the Caribbean.

"At this point, it would be nearly impossible to eradicate the ant because it is so widely dispersed," said Roger Gold, a Texas A&M University entomologist.

The good news? They eat fire ants, the stinging red terrors of Texas summers.

But the ants also like to suck the sweet juices from plants, feed on such beneficial insects as ladybugs, and eat the hatchlings of a small, endangered type of grouse known as the Attwater prairie chicken.

They also bite humans, though not with a stinger like fire ants.

Worse, they, like some other species of ants, are attracted to electrical equipment, for reasons that are not well understood by scientists.

They have ruined pumps at sewage pumping stations, fouled computers and at least one homeowner's gas meter, and caused fire alarms to malfunction. They have been spotted at NASA's Johnson Space Center and close to Hobby Airport, though they haven't caused any major problems there yet.

Exterminators say calls from frustrated homeowners and businesses are increasing because the ants—which are starting to emerge by the billions with the onset of the warm, humid season—appear to be resistant to over-the-counter ant killers.

"The population built up so high that typical ant controls simply did no good," said Jason Meyers, an A&M doctoral student who is writing his dissertation on the one-eighth-inch-long ant.

It's not enough just to kill the queen. Experts say each colony has multiple queens that have to be taken out.

At the same time, the ants aren't taking the bait usually left out in traps, according to exterminators, who want the Environmental Protection Agency to loosen restrictions on the use of more powerful pesticides.

And when you do kill these ants, the survivors turn it to their advantage: They pile up the dead, sometimes using them as a bridge to cross safely over surfaces treated with pesticide.

"It looked like someone had come along and poured coffee granules all around the perimeter of the rooms," said Lisa Calhoun, who paid exterminators $1,200 to treat an infestation of her parents' home in the Houston suburb of Pearland.

The Texas Department of Agriculture is working with A&M researchers and the EPA on how to stop the ants.

"This one seems to be like lava flowing and filling an entire area, getting bigger and bigger," said Ron Harrison, director of training for the big pest-control company Orkin Inc.

Life with my twin

Life with my twin
Category: Writing and Poetry

This poem is inspired by a current news story. I will post both the poem and the news story.

Life with my twin by Rob Hood©5-15-08

I always heard a voice talking to me

but I could not see who was speaking.

The voice babbled to a degree

I thought someone was critiquing

That someone was actually my twin

Who was with me through thick and thin.

It's a shame she isn't alive

I'm sad at birth she didn't survive

The doctors thought she was a tumor

I view this sadly with ill humor.

9-year-old girl's twin is found inside her stomach

ATHENS, Greece (AP) - A 9-year-old girl who went to hospital in central Greece suffering from stomach pains was found to be carrying her embryonic twin, doctors said Thursday.

Doctors at Larissa General Hospital examined the girl and surgically removed a growth they later discovered was an embryo more than two inches long.

"They could see on the right side that her belly was swollen, but they couldn't suspect that this tumor would hide an embryo," hospital director Iakovos Brouskelis said.

The girl has made a full recovery, he said.

Andreas Markou, head of the hospital's pediatric department, said the embryo was a formed fetus with a head, hair and eyes, but no brain or umbilical cord.

Markou said cases where one of a set of twins absorbs the other in the womb occurs in one of 500,000 live births.

The girl's family did not want to be identified, hospital officials said.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

The life of weeds

The life of weeds by Rob Hood©5-13-08

The lot was filled with weeds.

Grass didn't have the right nutrients

to meet it's needs.

But weeds have the knack

to exploit every crack.

They fill nearly every crevice

from Iceland to St. Kitts & Nevis.

They disperse themselves with seeds

blown by the wind

at various speeds.

They need very little space

because their roots

underneath unterlace.

They live their lives

wild and free

amid the mud and

the debris.

Thursday, May 8, 2008

Life on the farm

Life on the farm by Rob Hood©5-8-08

Spring is time to plant my crops

I need to sow the earth

when winter stops.

Planting seeds and bulbs

is tedious work

but I'd rather

work the earth than be a sales clerk.

Growing plants is lots of fun

and you are often rewarded

with abundance when

your job is done!

One year we grow corn

next year we grow clover

whose nutrients enrich the soil

and start the whole cycle over.

We raise some ducks, cattle and chicken

and get regular visits from the vet

so they won't sicken.

Early to bed, early to rise.

If you don't follow the rules

you might have a sad surprise.

Every day, there are chores to be done

and then we do the major work

out in the sun.

We recycle manure to feed the crops

We use nearly everything

and it never stops!

We grow clover and grasses to feed the cows.

We fill up as many silos as our money allows.

We eat pretty good throughout the year.

In summer we eat fresh vegtables

and even a steer,

In the fall we can and pickle the food

and when it's ready to eat

it sure is good!

We sell fresh veggies in the farmer's market

We load onto the truck

Then drive it and park it.

But our major crops are taken

to the city.

We pray our prices don't drop

because it would be a pity!

Our farm has been in our family

for over one hundred years.

I'm trying to keep it going

staying out of arrears!

The tree

The tree by Rob Hood©5-8-08

The tree gathered all it's nutrients

from the soil beneath it's feet.

It's leaves were bright green

and it's flowers smelled quite sweet.

It's shade brought great comfort

to those who sat in it's embrace.

They sat within it's shade

of which there was a trace.

Dance like no one's watching by Rob Hood©5-8-08

Dance like no one's watching by Rob Hood©5-8-08

I danced with all my vigor!

I danced with all my might!

The music was my trigger

and I felt out of sight!

I danced many dances

where I didn't know

the moves.

I dance them as

gracefully as if

I had a horse's hooves.

Later that evening

a friend said to me,

"I didn't know you

could tango.

You did it to a tee!"

The crippled man

The crippled man by Rob Hood©5-8-08

The crippled man staggered

down the street

His movements were forced

which caused him to feel beat.

But every night as he took his seat

he felt very blessed that he had feet.

Paying the price

Paying the price by Rob Hood©5-8-08

The rain fell in rivulets on that

wet and blustery day.

They hung him from a tree

because he had lost his way.

He was raised a farmers son

who knew the Bible well

but he befriended evil doers

and now he's

on his way to hell.

They held up a bank

and killed two customers

in their effort to get away.

A few policemen were

next door at a doughnut shop

and into the battle

they did stray.

The fight did not last long.

Most of the bad guys were slain,

but the farmer's boy was caught

and his verdict was quite plain.

"Hang him from the nearest tree"

was the judge's refrain.

"Too bad you messed up

young man.

Now your life is

down the drain."

Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Communing with nature

Communing with nature by Rob Hood©5-6-08

I love the lilac bushes that bloom

as I hike down the path.

I love the pretty fish that swim

in the stream where I take my bath.

I love to commune with nature

so real and pristine

as I while away the hours

far away from the city scene.

Monday, May 5, 2008

My vacation

My vacation by Rob Hood©5-5-08

As I lay in the shade in a hammock

a strong wind came and

I began to rock.

Around me is a scene

of indescribable beauty.

To take it all in

I feel, is my duty.

The sky is azure blue

It is all part

of a wonderous view!

Flora and fauna

are all around.

A beautiful variety

does abound!

I wish I could

remain here forever!

I'll need to save much

to attain that endeavour.

The rules

The rules by Rob Hood©5-5-08

I followed her directions

but, I got lost!

I listened to her

but I got bossed!

Then I threw up my hands!

I could no longer

listen to her commands!

The world will keep on turning

whether or not her temper

is a'burning!

I don't wish to offend

but, I won't be penned!

The pitcher

The pitcher by Rob Hood©5-5-08

My left arm is my prize possession!

I'm a guy with a baseball obsession.

I pitch every five days

and the baseball writers

issue me praise!

It's a great way to relieve my aggression!

The hive

The hive by Rob Hood©5-5-08

Stay away from there

if you want to be alive!

It's a dangerous place!

It;s a living beehive!

There must be 10,000

bees in there

They'll sting you to death

That's a sad affair!

It seems quite funny

that farmers make money

collecting their honey.

They have devised a way

to collect the honey

on any given day.

They immerse the hive in smoke

and while the bees are sleeping

they go for broke.

Thoughts

Thoughts by Rob Hood©5-5-08

Time is passing on my clock.

I hear the ocean's roaring

near my dock.

Life feels better

when I quantify.

I feel better measuring time

than wondering why

things are as they are.

I can't go very far

in understanding G-d's plan.

I am just a man.

I do what I can

and in the end

it matters little.

I'm glad that I'm alive

even though

I don't get the riddle.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

My dog and I

My dog and I by Rob Hood©5-1-08

My dog loves to play with me!

We've been together since I was 23.

He likes to play really rough

catching balls and lots of stuff.

And afterwards he relaxes with me

by laying his head upon my knee.

The cardinal

The cardinal by Rob Hood©5-1-08

I saw a redbird yesterday.

It was a male cardinal

I'd certainly say.

In the world of creatures

males are blessed

with the prettiest features.

It's a shame, I have to say

that women are rarely attracted

to men in that way.

Weeping willows

Weeping willows by Rob Hood©5-1-08

The weeping willows were moved

by the wind's sway.

It appeared as if some apparition

caused them to pray

that they would not

have to break

as the wind

caused them

violently to shake

and their lives would

continue another day.

The tree stump

The tree stump by Rob Hood©5-1-08

I see before me a lonely tree stump.

It's been shortened to just a clump.

It used to stand so tall

and now it's very small.

Once a mighty oak

and now a bump!

Today's weather

Today's weather by Rob Hood©5-1-08

The sun's sheen

painted the trees green.

The sky's hue

was true blue.

The world is so nice

I don't have to think twice.

It;s a beautiful day!

It's the first of May!

Childhood

Childhood by Rob Hood©5-1-08

See the children running and jumping

having some fun!

I wish childhood was forever!

My joy would never be done!

I'm lost

I'm lost by Rob Hood©5-1-08

I'm a child lost

in a strange land.

I have strayed

from my tribal band.

I try to be of service

but I'm very nervous

because I'm in a dessert

surrounded by shifting sand!

There's a storm coming

There's a storm coming by Rob Hood©5-1-08

I can feel it in the air

and I see dark clouds

approaching from everywhere!

We're gonna have a storm

because it's been too warm

and the climate will be

rain, not fair.

A lazy day

A lazy day by Rob Hood©5-1-08

Old houses line the street

filled with people for me to greet!

It's nice to get out on this land

and there's no need to hurry

because I have nothing planned.

My identity crisis

My identity crisis by Rob Hood©5-1-08

I want to get into my car

and drive away

really far

away from the world

that I know

because I'm sad and

full of woe!

Im trapped by

my family name

I want to get past it

and it's shame.

I'll settle in another place.

I'll change my ID

and have my own space!

Sunday, April 27, 2008

My patient file

My patient file by Rob Hood©4-27-08

There was a doctor's office snafu

caused by his inefficient crew.

There were lots of papers that

they wanted me to refile.

Not just a few, but quite a pile!

I told them, I filled them out last week

and if I have to repeat them now.I'll freak!

A few minutes later they found my file.

Now it's time for me to smile!

Thursday, April 24, 2008

A delayed birthday greeting

A delayed birthday greeting by Rob Hood©4-24-08

Happy birthday, I'm sorry this is late!

I hope your day turned out really great!

I hope that you have many more

spent with those who you adore!

Happy Birthday!

Monday, April 21, 2008

I'm a truck driving man

I'm a truck driving man by Rob hood©4-21-08

In my home there is nary a chair

and most of the floors

are completely threadbare.

Most of my money

is spent for diesel

and that's not funny!

I'm a truck driving man.

I deliver goods

as best as I can.

I never wanted to strike

but with the cost of petrol

I'd do better by bike.

I have always enjoyed

doing my work

but spending all of my earnings

makes me feel like a jerk.

Happy birthday,oldster


Happy birthday,oldster by Rob Hood 4-21-08

Happy birthday,my pal!

You just celebrated

71 years since ascending

from your Mom's birth canal!

I hope you had a wonderful day

full of friends and laughter

that you'll always

wish to replay!

Happy birthday!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

An untasty dish

An untasty dish by Rob Hood ©4-16-08

Eat shit and die

is not the type of nutrient

I'd ever try

Sadly I found out today

my mom is eating excrement

and that's not okay

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

The manatee


The manatee by Rob Hood©4-9-08

What a wondrous animal is the manatee

eating plants and avoiding humanity.

To live that way would be a vanity

out in the wild, alive and free!

It’s shape and look are extremely odd

proving a sense of humor by God.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

Another birthday greeting


Another birthday greeting by Rob Hood© 4-6-08

Happy birthday to you this day!

I’m hoping the skies are blue

not gray!

I wish for you many more

with great life experiences

that you can explore!

I wish you good health

and lots of joy

that no bad aura

can destroy!

Happy Birthday!

Friday, April 4, 2008

That darn cruise


That darn cruise by Rob Hood© 4-4-08

I was elated when I won that cruise!

I figured "What have I to lose?"

I now have found out.

I was thin

now I’m stout.

Do you think it was

the pastries and the booze?

Sunday, March 30, 2008

This is punny!

* I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
* Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
* Did you hear about the man whose entire left side was cut off? He’s all right now.
* The roundest knight at King Arthur’s round table was Sir Cumference.
* The butcher backed up into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
* The optometrist back up into the glass grinder and made a spectacle of himself.
* To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
* When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
* The psychic midget who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
* A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
* A thief fell and broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.
* Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.
* We’ll never run out of math teachers because they always multiply.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Boating mishap


Boating mishap by Rob Hood©3-26-08

While rowing down a river

a cold breeze caused

me to shiver.

While growing colder

I struck a boulder

reducing my boat

to a sliver.

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Birthday Wishes


Birthday Wishes by Rob Hood©3-6-08
Happy birthday for tomorrow morn
Celebratin' when you born
I hope you have a pleasant day
Filled with joy and laughter
that will stay
I hope you get all you need
All the pleasures
and I wish you Godspeed

Happy birthday!

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

The picture of 4 boys on the wall


The picture of 4 boys on the wall©3-5-08

There's a picture of four boys upon your wall.

It indicates that they are very small.

When they will grow up

and learn their stuff

chances are they'll be very tall.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

My talent

My talent by Rob Hood©5-26-04

It took me many years to know

As time went by SO--SLOW

that I could write a rhyme

in a modicum of time.

and now poems

have begun to flow!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

3 Happy Birthday Sends

Happy Birthday Sends by Rob Hood©2-20-08

I personalized 3 poems for birthdays and sent them out today.


Happy birthday although a day I'm late.

I didn't know it was your special date.

Hope yesterday was lots of fun

Not a cloudy day

but one of sun!

I hope that you have many more

Filled with joy and never a bore!

Happy birthday!!




Happy birthday on tomorrow morn

Commemorate the day

you were born!

Wishing you all the best!

Days of joy

that past the test.!

Happy birthday!



Happy Birthday! I know it's late.

But not knowing earlier

is my fate.

I hope you had a wonderful day

full of gladness

so that you can say hooray!

It's getting late and this

poem must end

and so to you

this email I'll send!

Happy Birthday!

Friday, February 15, 2008

Advice for the long haul

Advice for the long haul by Rob Hood©2-15-08

I just took a long run outside

and felt totally cool

but everyone looked at me

as if I were a fool.

My advice now is this

Before you run

be sure to put

some clothes on

you son of a gun.

Monday, February 11, 2008

A guessing game in Hell

A guessing game in Hell by Rob Hood©2-11-08

Where are you, my dear?

To the right of you

close to you

very near

Take off my blindfold

Give me a break

We've played this game

for hours

just for your sake!

Cheating is defeating

but if I don't leave soon

I'll miss my meeting

Sleep deprivation

wears me out

Is there a conclusion for this?

I have many a doubt

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Get lost!

Get lost!
Get lost! by Rob Hood©2-10-08

I carefully used my lance

to bring you out of your trance

After a glance

I took my stance

I am on the mark

but you are

still in the dark

I need to

trade my tread

and tell you off instead

So go and take a flight

and get yourself

out of my sight

Saturday, February 9, 2008

I'm very sad

I'm very sad by Rob Hood©2-9-08

While I weep as I walk

I can't even talk

blinded by the tears

A fire within me sears

All my torment

needs a release

It needs to vent

My saddness has enveloped

from thoughts that developed

As I sob and I cry

I heave an unearthly sigh

Because of the pain

in my brain

my tears have fallen like rain

And all of my lament

springs from the words

that you sent

Friday, February 8, 2008

The Ostrich

The Ostrich
Category: Writing and Poetry

The Ostrich by Rob Hood©2-8-08

The ostrich who stuck

her head in the sand

felt that her life

was really grand

Very little intrusion

allowed this

grand illusion

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Vegas days

Vegas days by Rob Hood©2-6-08

See the blocks

beneath my socks

My world is quickly turning

I've a fever that's aburning

I sit at the table

doing what I'm able

Gambling is a fever

and I'm a true believer

I'm a math major

and I love to savor

the odds of winning

while the wheel is spinning

I know when to bluff

or take it on the cuff

That's my job description

My ideas require subscription

People ask me how I do it

There's really nothing to it

I just sit there looking bored

and while others lose, I scored

Many of you work 9 to 5

but I don't have that drive

although I am a player

I'll never be an all dayer

Twice a month is enough

to pay for all my stuff

Most days I'm off and free

to live life to the nth degree

I know you'll all agree

this is a wonderful way to be!

A date with destiny

A date with destiny by Rob Hood©2-4-08

Sleep has nearly eluded me

caused by fears

I could not see

What allowed me

to go back to sleep?

Sheer exhaustion

way down deep

I then awoke

to meet my fate

because this was the time

This was the date

Will I follow the correct way,

get on the right path and

fail to stray?

As I take a short moment

I seem to stare

I mouth a few words

that form a prayer

I step forward into a bog

I can't see around me

I'm in a fog

I keep moving forward

without taking a break

There is no time for dalliance

I've a job to fortake

The fog is lifting

The sun shines through

The climate is warming

and the skies are blue

As my confidence rises

I know that I'll make it through

I'll handle my problems

and give it my due

Friday, February 1, 2008

Chains of life by Rob Hood©1-31-08

Chains of life by Rob Hood©1-31-08

Some chains of life need to be forever unbroken

To change them could lead to terrible consequences

unspoken.

My life is but a link

that is over in a blink

I will continue to keep the chain as my token.

Other chains can be a mistake

leading to horrible consequences in their wake

It's hard to be the one

to do what must be done

I'm proud to be the man who made that break!

Monday, January 28, 2008

Thank you for your birthday greeting

Thank you for your birthday greeting by Rob Hood©01-28-08


Thank you for your birthday greeting

I'm so greatly thrilled!

Although my day was short and fleeting

My happiness is filled!

It's so nice to get attention

on this my natal day!

Birthdays are a great invention!

I hope they're here to stay!

Sunday, January 27, 2008

My life and other disasters

My life and other disasters by Rob Hood©1-27-08

When I was young

life was quite fun

and the world

seemed great to me

"Nothing can hurt me

I'll live forever

They'll be many

things that I see!"

As I aged

I reached a stage

where work defined

what I did

It seemed really funny

but I need the money

to do things that seemed

free as a kid.

I worked at my station

until there came

my vacation

that I looked

forward to forever

I was going to the islands

staying clear of all high lands

that was my greatest endeavor

When a big wave went out

there arose a shout

The sand was

littered with many things

I saw fish out of water

large sea shells

and crabs that

are called "kings".

As I gazed further out

water was moving all about

the waves were rising very high

I turned and ran

It became my plan

to reach a place

that would stay dry

Something lifted me

above a tree

I grabbed onto

it's highest branch.

All around me

were screams and shouts

in English and in French.

I held on what seemed forever

thinking that I'd never

survive this ordeal

would I ever get back

to my homey little shack

and get my life back on keel?

when I got back home

I sat alone

thinking that life was still good

I did arrive

back here alive

and thought that I always would.

As I ate my meal

I began to feel

that everything was fine

"I'll get on with my life

there's no time to pine".

When I saw the

comet in the sky

I started to vomit my pie

it has flown so near

the planet we all hold dear

soon all my friends

and I will die.

Sunday, January 20, 2008

A poem at a funeral

A poem at a funeral by Rob Hood©1-20-08

Life is but a moment in time

just like a syllable in a rhyme.

A moment that's fleeting.

A few heartbeats, a'beating

all in G-d's great design.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Don't Tread on Me

Don't Tread on Me by Rob Hood© 1-16-08

It may not be to your deference

to use me as your reference.

While sometimes I may care,

you'll find that very rare.

Some think of me an up and comer

but i march to a different drummer.

If you wish everything to be as you say

stay the heck out of my way.

Though I won't do your bidding

I'm very responsible as is fitting.

When I pledge my service

your fear of my non-completion

need not make you nervous.

My word is good as gold

It's a certainty on which

you can hold.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

My way

My Way by Rob Hood©2004

I want to distance myself

and to hide

Way clear over

on the other side.

I won't confide

all that I feel inside

while words and feelings

flow from me

I cannot express

what I do not see

I try to express

answers that are direct

although most of my answers

no one will expect

I like things difficult

I love complex

If the world turns simple

I'll be perplexed