Monday, May 3, 2010

Assorted limericks by moi

An eccentric soprano named Brett
Voted for every politician she met.
She voted for Herr Obama
and despite all the trauma
She didn't have any regret

A wealthy old woman named Kate
Went fishing with scorpion as bait
She liked things her exotic
Twas something hypnotic
When it stung she didn’t feel great.

A miserly fellow name Joe
Had a fall and injured his toe
It took a turn bad
And was quite sad
Cause when the docs
wanted to operate
he said, no.


There once was a baker, Lenore
who cultured yeast into something more
As she started to drink
she lost her ability to think
And couldn’t tell the ceiling from the floor

A symphony cellist named Kate
Grew bigger from the food she ate.
When eating a whole veal
Met he requirements for a meal.
She used her kitchen table as a plate

An unemployed person named Nick
When working usually took sick
He excelled in excuses
He used many ruses
Cause working was not a scene he’d pick

A woman whose hair was quite gray,
Was opinionated with lots to say
She’d talk a blue streak
Endlessly each week
As she frightened her beaus away.


There’s a hint of sweet spring in the air
and I have a peaceful feeling, quite rare
Though bullets may fly
in both June and July
On my spring vacation I haven’t a care.

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